Get over “the vapors …”

I can’t condone what Donald Trump said over a decade ago.  It was coarse, rude and offensive. If anything, it showed Trump as an arrogant jerk trying to be “one of the boys.”

But that’s not news. He’s always been like that. He has no filters.  

However, and it’s a big however, I’m really tired of the media and others spinning this as so hurtful to women that it automatically disqualifies him to be President. 

It’s astonishingly hypocritical. 

In case anyone’s been asleep for the last 50 years or so, here’s a newsflash: Modern women are not delicate flowers prone to “the vapors” and so sensitive that they break down in tears if anyone says something mean about them or comments on their sexual attractiveness. 

American women are flying combat missions overseas, for God’s sake, where our enemies are trying to kill them. For decades we’ve had women negotiating face-to-face with world leaders.  Women are running billion-dollar businesses. Most of my client contacts have almost always been women.  Women compete with men all the time in the workplace; some can be every bit as ruthless and conniving as the worst men they fight with for position, power and money.  

And I can tell you from firsthand experience that given the right circumstances – such as when they think they are talking only among themselves – women can be as raunchy if not raunchier than their male counterparts.  They’ll ogle someone’s ass, speculate on someone’s sexual attributes, and discuss with each other who they’d like to sleep with and why. Just like men.    

This is no big secret to many women. What might be a secret to them is how well their voices travel through the thin walls of bathrooms in bars, restaurants and many businesses. 

But what about our innocent and impressionable young women? 

Well, we now live in a world where celebrated female performers like Miley Cyrus, Beyoncé, Katy Perry, and Madonna – all idolized by millions of young women – openly flaunt their sexuality on stage or appear in sexually provocative videos. Some female celebrities have released homemade sex tapes to advance their careers. 

Today's hip-hop culture produces music and videos that are far more demeaning to women in general, in even more graphic terms, and there’s little push back. In fact, Michelle Obama – who has been out on the campaign trail saying how hurtful Trump’s comments were – has invited some of the most misogynistic and vulgar rappers to the White House and praised their “work.” 

The net effect is that our popular culture now encourages young women to dress like strippers, act like sluts, and post online and/or sext sexually explicit images and videos of themselves. Why do you think Snapchat is so popular with young women – especially millennials?  Hint: It’s because Snapchat messages expire after a time and disappear leaving no trace. 

Slightly older women in sultry poses are promoting Viagra for their boyfriends in TV commercials shown in prime time.  The idea is that now these women can have their boyfriends get single-pack Viagra just in time for that cruise or other vacation. When commercials have women promoting products to help their sex partners maintain an erection I’d say times have changed. 

So spare me the manufactured outrage from celebrities and the media about what Trump said as insulting and objectifying women. They need to take a look in the mirror. 

That said, is it unfair to criticize Trump for being a pig and a lout?  No.  Yet to me it’s unfair to imply that because he at times fantasizes about sex and uses awful language he’s a dangerous sexual predator.  If that were the case you’d have to lock up practically every American male – straight or gay – over the age of 12 and a helluva lot of American women, too. 

Certainly he’s exhibited bad judgement by allowing himself to be recorded saying stupid and insensitive stuff.  But you have to give him credit for saying what he really thinks – dumb or not – instead of prevaricating on such things as “it depends on what the meaning of ‘is,’ is …”  

Unlike Trump I’m not going to make a moral equivalency of what he’s said – or even done – to the actions of others so revered by the media and the Democrats.

A pig is a pig is a pig. Regardless of party affiliation. However, if you are a Democrat pig you are much more likely to get a pass from the media. 

There’s a lot to dislike about Trump personally. He’s not a great role model. Neither is Hillary. I don’t think anyone with the good sense God gave a sweet potato wants their son or daughter to grow up like either of them. They are both truly awful human beings.

But does that actually have anything to do with whether they would be a good President? 

We’ve had good Presidents who were loathsome people.  We’ve also had admirable people with stellar values and integrity who were mediocre if not downright awful Presidents.  We’ve had openly corrupt Presidents who used the office to enrich themselves and their friends.

We’ve survived them all.   

Rarely – and extremely rarely – we’ve had great Presidents who kept their decency and integrity intact and served us well. 

Unfortunately, those rare exceptions seem to be in our distant past.  Even those remarkable Presidents and their legacies are under constant attack by a media and popular culture that want to tear them down with out-of-context “facts” and innuendo; it’s an ongoing attempt to “prove” that nobody is perfect, and there really are no heroes. Everybody has flaws. 

Which is true, because we’re all human.

Hillary’s made a big deal about Trump calling some women pigs and slobs. She’s running commercials showing young women looking in mirrors hurt by such words. She’s tried to make the case that Trump’s statements have led to increased bullying and great emotional distress to women everywhere. I’m not sure either is true.

If anything, I’d suggest that the hypersensitivity many women have about their self-image is far more a creation of the media and the popular culture than anything Trump has ever said. 

Also, what Trump said in other statements may be hurtful to some and in bad taste to articulate openly, but perhaps true.  Some women and men as well are pigs and slobs. Trump himself is fat. So is Hillary. For some reason it would be okay to call Trump fat – which some in the media have – but way out of bounds and immensely hurtful to state the same about her. 

And that’s my point.  There can’t be acceptable and unacceptable versions of the truth at the same time, based solely on gender, sexual orientation, or ethnicity. 

Some things simply are, or are not. It may be insensitive or crass depending on the context and the audience, but it never depends on what the meaning of the word is, is. 

Take the dustup over the winner of the Miss Universe pageant – a beauty contest, not a “scholarship pageant.” She did put on a lot of weight after winning the title and that was inconsistent to what the people running the Miss Universe pageant expected or wanted.  Then she got involved in a lot of unseemly low-life behavior that also drew unwanted attention to her, including a boyfriend accused of kidnapping, reports that she threatened the life of a judge, and apparently having filmed sex with another contestant on a foreign version of Big Brother. 

If she were a man she’d be the object of ridicule and on the front page of every tabloid rag as a loser who blew their shot at fame and fortune by being a venal dirt bag. She’d be covered in the same way as the male lottery winner who was robbed of over $140 thousand he had in his pickup truck while he was in a strip club in the middle of the day.

When Hillary trotted her out as someone besmirched and hurt by statements Trump made about her appearance, lack of integrity, and questionable behavior  – which given all the facts now seem justified in many ways – Hillary picked the wrong horse to ride.  But it made no difference to the media who dutifully reported everything Trump said, but not the reality. 

Look, I understand why some women are offended by what Trump said on a hot mic more than a decade ago.  He showed bad taste is saying it; someone else showed a lack of ethics by holding on to a tape of a private conversation for over a decade and then releasing it in the middle of a Presidential campaign. Still, it was stupid on his part. He should have known better.   

Will it cost him the woman vote? I believe that ship sailed long ago, well before this.

As sad as it is, in this era of “the first” fascination, Hillary will get a lot of votes simply because she’s the first female candidate for President from a major party.  Just as I believe a lot of people voted for Obama for much the same reason – the first black candidate from a major party – I think a certain percentage of the voters will do the same for Hillary. They want to be a part of history. 

And, as has been widely reported, a significant portion of the female voting population, especially young unmarried women, are expected to vote for Hillary simply because she is a woman and because many feel it's "her turn."  I doubt many male voters are voting for Trump simply because he's a man and Hillary is a woman.       

Trump’s support comes from a far different slice of the electorate:  people – many quite angry – who are fed up with political correctness, corruption in government by special interests, and the way the political establishment and media seemingly cooperate to maintain the status quo. 

As Tucker Carlson put it so aptly recently: if you’re the type of person who wants to give the finger to the establishment, Trump’s your guy; if you like the way things are, you’re for Hillary.

The release of the tape won’t significantly change anything. People who hate Trump got more ammunition; people who love Trump will brush it off as nothing more than a tempest in a teapot. Trump’s adversaries can release all the other off-color stuff Trump has said over the years and it really won’t change how his supporters feel about him.

As evidence, Trump’s poll numbers haven’t cratered amidst all the media coverage over his statements about women. That surprises me, to be honest. Still if just about any other Republican were running against Hillary they’d be crushing her – Trump’s the best thing that ever happened for Hillary’s campaign, that's for sure.       

  

I also believe many of the women now claiming to be offended are saying that because they’ve been told they should be offended, not because it actually affects them directly.  And when the media brings out women who claim Trump touched them inappropriately 30 years ago, that’s a tad long to be holding a grudge and not saying anything in my opinion – it doesn’t seem all that believable.  I suspect many are just looking for their 15 minutes of fame.

That’s not to say it didn’t happen.  Or that it’s acceptable. 

At this point it doesn’t make much difference either way. 

As some Brit politician wisely said: We’re electing a President; not a Pope. 

For myself, I’ll take a sexist pig like Trump I can trust – character flaws and all – over a political prostitute like Hillary who has shown time and again she will do anything for money, including selling all the rest of us, and our national security, down the river for the right price. 

If the prospect of Hillary as President doesn’t scare you then what Trump said shouldn’t either.